Welcome back, my little snakey darlings! It's me, the one and only and very magical Auntie Wolf. And yes, before you chastise me for being away, I am fully aware that I have been absent since January, but even us Seers have to take a little holiday sometimes, you know. Our third eyes do get tired of all the portents and problems. But I am back, so let's get on with it, shall we?
Aries:
So first things first. I can see in the depths of my crystal ball that you have been wallowing in the depths of self-pity for the last month, haven't you? That is not going to help you one bit, Child. Life is not one great Shakespearean tragedy now, is it? With Scorpio standing in your corner this month, you should have the courage to get up, brush off the stage dust and carry on like a Hero!
Taurus:
Hmmmmm, hold onto the curtain ropes there little one! There is no need to drown your audience in enthusiasm that's enough to rival Widow Twanky. It's obvious to anyone with a brain that you are a star in the making, but it's not fair to shine your light so brightly that the others around you get tossed into the wings. So just settle a little and learn to share the spotlight, OK?
Gemini:
Oh, you wonderful little flying monkey you! Aren't you just the cutest when you get all protective of your friends? With Virgo sitting on your shoulder, you are spreading the love this month and being the rock that everyone can lean on. Just remember, though, that some of your friends need to learn to fight their own battles. So just do your best to keep your claws to yourself until needed.
Cancer:
Past the point of no return... No second glances... That's right, Child. My tea leaves have decided that it's "Make or Break" time for you this month. Your relationship triangle has come to a head, and now you must choose. The stage is set, and if you don't want Mr Lloyd Webber writing an opera about you, then I suggest that you pick carefully. One path leads to Summertime, and the other will captivate you with the "Music of the Night"!
Leo:
Oh, for goddess's sake! 57 Galleons for new Kau Chim rods? That's ridiculous. It's a good job you and I have been saving up for the last month or two now, isn't it now, my thrifty little dangernoodle? All that extra cash is going to come in handy this month for sure. Things that you rely on in the home are going to become about as useful as soggy Hairspray, so you will have to spend wisely when replacing them. Luckily you can't stop the happy beat, and luck is on your side!
Virgo:
Well, according to my tarot cards, it seems someone has been burning the midnight oil again and riding the Starlight Express. That couldn't possibly be my pretty little Virgos now, can it? I certainly hope not. You need to get some rest and take it easy, baby sneks! The last thing anyone needs is you being tired and cranky. So listen to Auntie Wolf and take a day off. Your body will thank you for it. Promise!
Libra:
Oh my! I see that a revolution is in your charts this month! I'm not quite sure what you are rebelling against, but it's very clear in your star chart that Mars has lit a fire under your behind. Just please be careful who you fight against. The people may be singing in support of you, but I would hate to see you in a state of Les Miserables just because you don't like the consequences of your choices.
Scorpio:
Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice.... Ooops, I better not finish that thought, but I have a feeling that you might this spooky season. I'm sensing a great sense of mischief building in you this month, and I don't think anyone in your life is going to come away unscathed. And yes, before you argue with me, you fiesty cobras, I know it's all in the name of comedy, but not everyone shares your sense of humour. Especially at work or school. So just try and behave, please?
Sagittarius:
The Circle of Life is going to be front and centre in your life this month, my little darlings. All my dreams of late tell me that you will have all the highs and lows of a magical carpet ride in the following days and weeks. From fairytale romances to greek odysseys abroad, you will have it all. So get ready to smile, laugh and cry so much that you'll easily match any good Drama Face.
Capricorn:
Awwww, I'm so happy for you, my little Juliettes. The sun and moon are dancing beautifully in your star House this month, and that only means one thing. Your autumn days are going to be filled with all the warm and fuzzy love you can handle. So get ready for cosy sweaters, hot chocolate and snuggly cuddles by the fire as the Romeos special people in your life show you just how much you mean to them.
Aquarius:
Jellicle Cats are out to play this month! Those tricky little creatures are all around to make the waters of your sign bubble with happiness this autumn season. So whether you are on the move like Skimbleshanks or languishing at home like Jennyanydots, keep your eyes open for a magical furry companion at your side. They can only make your day better if you let them.
Pisces:
Oh my gosh, why is my head beginning to hurt? It sounds like a turf battle up there. Are you confused? So am I! Your chart looks like a Jet wash of colours that is worse than a Shark eating my acrylics! Let's just hope you don't have to sing like Maria to get it all sorted out. I have no idea what is going on, but I wish you luck, dearie! You might need it!
OK, finally all done, my lovelies. I can finally have a nap. So until next time, Stay theatrical! - Auntie Wolf