Letter from the editor
By deidra
Did anyone else end up in a crazy place where you were a different creature recently? I must have accidently grabbed a portkey, and after a woosh, I was in a different place and I was a gorgon! You know, like Medusa? Pansy was a mermaid. Oana was a dragon. I was very confused at first, but then it ended up being a ton of fun. There were creature races, sonnet writing, and some really weird creature cross breeding. Despite that, I am very glad to be back in the office. I missed having feet, and the whole snake-hair thing got old, fast. My snakes never cooperated into anything remotely presentable.
Upon my return to our humble office, I discovered something rather shocking. Pansy had taken over May's issue of SOUP. When I asked her about it (nicely, and with chocolate), she replied "“Well, April showers brings May flowers, and I am the prettiest flower in all Slytherin!”" Obviously, I agreed with her. I like sleeping in our bed, and not the couch. What I didn't know is that her take-over meant that she'd taken over my desk as well. Thus, I'm sitting in the corner of my former office, on a stolen pouf from the Divination Classroom, with the typewriter balancing precariously on a stack of old SOUP issues.
From what I can gather, she talked Draco Malfoy into writing an article about her. Apparently, she never bothered to inform him that we were married. This pleases me immensely. That smug little ferret thinks that everyone worships the ground he walks on. Well, guess what, you little snot, I got the best girl at Hogwarts. Yes, fine, I admit it. I'm jealous that she asked him to write an article about her, and not me. When I confronted her, she told me she knew how busy I was, and didn't want to bother me. Such a sweet and thoughtful wife, isn't she?
I have no doubt that this issue is going to be our best and most popular issue yet. After all, who doesn't want to read about the fabulous Pansy Parkinson? Apparently, a lot of people didn't know her and I were married. The reason for this is that we had a very private wedding in Paris, and just kept it to ourselves. Trust me, I was very surprised that she didn't want everyone and their mother at our wedding. Instead, we just had a private ceremony at the top of the Eiffel Tower at sunset. Ridiculously romantic, right?
The only thing that worries me is that I have no idea where Lu and Tyler are, and on top of that, I keep hearing things coming from Pansy's closet, but it's hard to tell because her closet is basically its own country (not even kidding). If anyone hears from them, let me know. In the meantime, enjoy this perfect issue of SOUP, and Pansy wanted me to tell you that she accepts gifts of shoes, chocolate, and the blood of her enemies.
All my love and adoration,
Alisha
Editor-In-Chief
By deidra
Did anyone else end up in a crazy place where you were a different creature recently? I must have accidently grabbed a portkey, and after a woosh, I was in a different place and I was a gorgon! You know, like Medusa? Pansy was a mermaid. Oana was a dragon. I was very confused at first, but then it ended up being a ton of fun. There were creature races, sonnet writing, and some really weird creature cross breeding. Despite that, I am very glad to be back in the office. I missed having feet, and the whole snake-hair thing got old, fast. My snakes never cooperated into anything remotely presentable.
Upon my return to our humble office, I discovered something rather shocking. Pansy had taken over May's issue of SOUP. When I asked her about it (nicely, and with chocolate), she replied "“Well, April showers brings May flowers, and I am the prettiest flower in all Slytherin!”" Obviously, I agreed with her. I like sleeping in our bed, and not the couch. What I didn't know is that her take-over meant that she'd taken over my desk as well. Thus, I'm sitting in the corner of my former office, on a stolen pouf from the Divination Classroom, with the typewriter balancing precariously on a stack of old SOUP issues.
From what I can gather, she talked Draco Malfoy into writing an article about her. Apparently, she never bothered to inform him that we were married. This pleases me immensely. That smug little ferret thinks that everyone worships the ground he walks on. Well, guess what, you little snot, I got the best girl at Hogwarts. Yes, fine, I admit it. I'm jealous that she asked him to write an article about her, and not me. When I confronted her, she told me she knew how busy I was, and didn't want to bother me. Such a sweet and thoughtful wife, isn't she?
I have no doubt that this issue is going to be our best and most popular issue yet. After all, who doesn't want to read about the fabulous Pansy Parkinson? Apparently, a lot of people didn't know her and I were married. The reason for this is that we had a very private wedding in Paris, and just kept it to ourselves. Trust me, I was very surprised that she didn't want everyone and their mother at our wedding. Instead, we just had a private ceremony at the top of the Eiffel Tower at sunset. Ridiculously romantic, right?
The only thing that worries me is that I have no idea where Lu and Tyler are, and on top of that, I keep hearing things coming from Pansy's closet, but it's hard to tell because her closet is basically its own country (not even kidding). If anyone hears from them, let me know. In the meantime, enjoy this perfect issue of SOUP, and Pansy wanted me to tell you that she accepts gifts of shoes, chocolate, and the blood of her enemies.
All my love and adoration,
Alisha
Editor-In-Chief