My Dear Munchie
By Lenalie Diana Collier
Cats. They're intelligent, cunning, graceful (mostly), and independent, all bound up in one cute, furry package. The perfect Slytherin pet! Forget owls—use the school birds! Pygmy Puffs are cute and all, but nowhere near as cute as cats, and don't even get me started on toads. Trust me; cats are the answer, plain and simple. Every witch and wizard should have one of these fabulous felines in their lives. I promise you, they do wonders.
Now, before you go running off to the Magical Menagerie, there's one tiny thing you need to be aware of: You don't own cats, cats own you. You are the food bringer, the toy, the bed, and whatever else your cat wishes you to be. They are your king or queen, and you must obey their every whim. Don't get discouraged. They're not demanding rulers. Most of the time, you'll find them sleeping somewhere warm or bathing themselves until their coats shine. You just have to make sure you're there when they do make requests, unless you like losing fingers.
I know, I know. That doesn't sound so good, but once you get past the whole servant-for-eternity thing, having a cat becomes quite a pleasure. Take me and my Munch, for example. You hear parents bragging about their children all the time, right? Well, I brag about my cat, so prepare for a whole lot of bragging. It's too late to turn back now, you have to listen.
Munch is a wonderful queen. She sleeps on my bed every night, all stretched out across half the mattress. (I'd like some room sometimes, too, but that's okay. I curl up.) In the morning, she makes sure I get enough sleep by placing her paws—claws out—on my legs until she's decided it's time to wake up. Always thinking of me!
Once I'm up, she follows me around the house for a while. She waits for me to finish my cereal, and then insists I give her my milk. I don't drink it anyway, so I am happy to oblige. Then, we spend the rest of the day playing at random intervals, sleeping at others, until it's time for bed.
Munch is so smart. I taught her to sit and play fetch with the little bouncy balls you get out of Muggle quarter machines. We played tag today, too! (Yes, cats can play tag.) She also has a talent for knocking things off tables, especially the things that can spill. Amazing, right?
See? You totally want a cat. I told you! So, now that you know what to expect and you have a glimpse of all the wonderful things a cat may bring you, go to Diagon Alley to add a bit of royalty into your life! Need any help with names? I'm sure I could help with that, too!
Until next time!
Lenalie Diana Collier