Okay. So normally, I'm a pretty easygoing guy. But this month's theme has me flummoxed. I'm not really sure what it is about "steampunk" that I'm reacting so strongly against - but it just seems all sorts of wrong to me.
On the surface of it, my reaction doesn't make sense. After all, I like steam. Steam is great! Steam lets you know when things are too hot to handle, like dragon breath or boiling potions, or even stew.
Steam can make you feel better if you have a head cold and don't have any pepper-up potion handy. Steam can also obscure other people's vision if you need to hide something quickly.
Not that I have any experience with that, mind you.
So that's not the part of "steampunk" that rubs me the wrong way. But see, here's the problem - punk doesn't either. While that's not really my thing, I certainly don't have any objections to punk. At least, I don't think I do. Truth is, I only have a vague idea of what punk is all about. I know that loud, yelly, crashing music with a lot of cringy chords is part of it. And then there appears to be tons of black leather clothes and half-shaved hair and numerous tattoos and stuff. (See what I did there? It might be a bad pun, but even bad puns are cool!).
Anyway, that seems to be all there is to punk as far as I've been able to find out. Nothing important or objectionable, really. It's just some people's thing, just like I'm into flying and fireworks and pranks.
But somehow? Steampunk feels different to me. I just don't see how they go together, steam and punk. At all. It would be like saying, "I'm into Quidditchfrogs!" Both Quidditch and frogs are fine - even great - on their own. But smushed together like that? No, thank you.
I did try asking around to find out what this steampunk is all about. Apparently, it all has to do with gears and clockwork and brown leather cloth, either as clothes or upholstery. So now I'm just confused. I mean... the leather I get - that's the punk part, right?
But if people wanted to make clockwork things with gears and leather and stuff, why not just say that right up front in the name? Why bring either steam or punk into it? Call it "Creative Clockworks" or even "Grand Gears"!
One of my so-called friends (looking at you, Tabitha) was trying to take the mickey out of me, I'm sure, for not knowing what steampunk was by telling me that the Hogwarts Express itself was actually steampunk.
But that can't possibly be right. Can it?