Revenge is a dish best served...with crystals and diamonds and stuff?
Okay, I admit. I thought it was funny to make the feline converse in verse. But that was before she extracted her revenge. How was I to know that not only would she give me back our column for another month, but she was gonna actually make me work for it? She knows I don't cook. I mean, really. Open fires are one thing, but do you know how many times I'd singe my wings trying to fiddle with stoves and stuff? Just...no. I made a happy exception for that King Cake because cake. But now I was stuck. A recipe with diamonds? I racked my brain for days over that one. And then I remembered that lovely Muggle invention: Goggle. Or something like that.
"Hey, Syrup!" I crowed at the little Muggle device I'd borrowed from some hapless
Syrup did his best, I'll give him that. First he found me a Diamond Chef - or rather quite a few of them. I had no idea that was a thing. I assumed it was an alchemist who had discovered a spell to enhance the brewing of Diamonds or some such. I couldn't have been more wrong, although some of those treats did look quite tasty. Still. It wasn't quite what I had had in mind.
Next, the determined little search-engine-that-almost-could found me Sparkling Sugar (scroll down and you'll see why I was particularly fond of this page; that color just pops out at one!) But still. That wasn't a recipe, either, unless you count just picking a favorite recipe at random and throwing that stuff on top of it. Which isn't a bad idea, now that I think about it.
Finally, however, in desperation, I asked directly about crystals, figuring that would be as close to diamonds as I could get. To my surprise and delight, I found a wonderful recipe for Sugar Crystals (which, when I was growing up, was called Rock Candy) that even a dragon could manage!
Candy Diamonds (aka Sugar Crystals on a Stick) YIELD: Variable
INGREDIENTS:
2 cups water
6 cups white sugar
1/4 cup additional white sugar (set aside)
Food coloring (optional and variable)
SUPPLIES:
Saucepan
Wooden spoon
Measuring cups
Clothespins
Wooden sticks/bamboo skewers
Glasses/jars
STEP ONE: SETUP
1. Place 5 drops of food coloring into each glass/jar you will use (one jar per candy stick)
2. Clip each stick onto the middle of a clothespin and balance it on the top of the jar/glass so that the stick does not touch any part of the glass itself.
STEP TWO: HEAT
1. Heat the water and sugar together in a saucepan on high heat. Stir constantly to dissolve the sugar.
2. Bring to a boil, still stirring. Boil and stir for 1 min, then turn off the heat.
STEP THREE: POUR
1. Carefully pour the sugar syrup mixture into a heat-resistant pitcher, then remove the clothespins and fill each jar to the same height.
2. Using a metal fork or spoon, stir the mixture to combine the food coloring with the sugar syrup in each jar.
3. Allow mixture to cool for a half-hour.
STEP FOUR: WET
1. Dip each stick into its jar, then roll the wet stick into the quarter-cup of dry sugar reserved at the beginning until the stick is thoroughly coated with dry sugar. (This will give the crystals a base to grow from.)
2. Put the stick back onto its clothespin and reposition it so that the stick is immersed in its jar without touching the sides or bottom of the glass.
3. Set each completed jar aside for 2 to 3 days and watch the crystals grow!
STEP FIVE: DRY
1. Remove each stick and allow the excess liquid to run and drip off back into the jar.
2. Set the stick on a folded paper towel to dry.
STEP SIX: ENJOY
1. Crunch.
Really, cooking isn't nearly so bad as you might think. Especially if it grows you lovely, shiny, tasty treats like this one! Just don't tell the feline that I hijacked her column just to make rock candy.
